We are all Mutants


Professor X

We store our radioactive waste
in huge containers in the classroom.
Not in secure spaces
guarded by armored gorillas with rabies
in case a kid mistakes it for play dough
or a supervillain takes it during a lunch break,
We leave it out in the open
where all the students can see it
and maybe treat them to a dose
if their grades are mostly amazing.

They’re exposed early these days
to all sorts of radiation:
from harmful ultraviolets made by the sun
to braces that block alien transmissions from space.
But such understated cell mutation
pales in comparison to the gamma rays
that we place on their lab reports
and paint on their notebooks.

This mad experiment stolen
from the pages of Dexter’s Laboratory
is the first step in a quest
to make the next X-Men Academy
to create an extracurricular club
dedicated to community service by fighting evil
to make a class of superhero students
who will be featured at Comic-con
(not ironically).
For everyone knows it looks great on a resume to
save the world from a madman with a suction hose
attempting to dispose of the world’s oceans.

But in reality,
we don’t need to feed them a breakfast of
Green Hulk Wheaties,
even if they make for sugar seasoned champions.
They’ve amassed a fat stack
of superpowers all their own
to dominate the demons that threaten the world today.

Using Facebook to assemble a force
greater than The Avengers, Captain Planet,
The Justice League and Ninja Turtles combined,
In time they will be the freedom fighters
that the next decades’ children
will play on Halloween.


11 thoughts on “We are all Mutants

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