Round 1: Captains log, star date sometime in 2013, day 78 of our voyage
This may be a parsec too stretched,
but I took the Libraty to compose
a few space groans.
Ursa Major challenge
to photon which joke is best;
eSETIlly with an astronomical theme.
You can’t escape the gravity of the humor,
there’s no way to planet properly
(your escape from the pull
of the massive, Higgs-like comedy).
Siriusly, I Apollogize Challenger,
but you lost this round.
My dark energy blasted you away
to deep space and beyond,
like a kamehameha
made of the accelerating universe.
Here’s Hawking you’ll travel
at the speed of light
and bring some Big Bangs
back to win this
Interplanetary rap battle